Why is it hard to hope?
Though we work with men and women, most of our clients seem to be women with very similar stories. The Tummy Team specializes in core rehabilitation but most people do not truly understand what their core is. This isn’t just the understanding of our physical core muscles but the emotional and spiritual nature of our core. The core is the structure and foundation that everything else is built upon. It is the stabilizing force that allows for effective, pain-free movement. It is the internal support for all of our external activity. The core is essential for life. It is essential spiritually, emotionally and physically.
Many of our female clients come to us weak and disconnected from their core and ultimately feeling broken. At some time in their life, they were either violated, hurt or rejected. At one time or another, they believed that their body failed them due to abuse, injury, infertility, miscarriage, rape, a difficult birth, an unexpected c-section, a poor birth recovery, etc. There was a time they had to survive and push through and they suddenly found themselves feeling like they were living in a strangers body, disconnected and weak. There are a multitude of responses to this. Some have sought help and received only a little encouragement. Many have chosen to accept weakness, pain, and disconnect. Others have believed this is simply the cost of motherhood and growing older as a woman. Some become obsessed with looking for solutions and obsessed with all of the broken pieces of themselves. They analyze and evaluate every piece of themselves that is not working. Regardless of where they fall on this spectrum, most of the women we see have little to no hope of getting better.
Our first session with these clients is almost completely about giving them hope. We spend time helping them understand how their body was designed and why it is not functioning well. Some of our clients cling to this hope like it is a lifeline. But there are others that, sadly, on some level reject the hope we try to provide. It seems too difficult to hope, at least in the beginning. As we slowly begin changing things, hope finally starts to spring up…only to then be squashed by the fear of healing.
Why would we be afraid to heal?
Healing can be scary. When we have finally decided to accept our situation, the thought of hoping with the risk of disappointment can be emotionally overwhelming. If we have adjusted our entire life around our weakness or our pain, it can be terrifying to consider what life might be like without those adjustments. We can use pain and brokenness as soft padding that buffers us from the world, excluding us from connecting or living on a greater level. It doesn’t make sense but we get comfortable and we call that place our home – a place we are afraid to leave. If we have spent a large part of our life looking for cures, treatments or explanations for why we are the way we are, and we become healed, well…what are we going to do now?
The truth is you were placed here to live your story. While our stories are not without pain and suffering, the truth is your body was created out of a perfect design. The truth is women were designed to have babies and not fall apart. The truth is our bodies were designed for a beautiful balance between stability and mobility. The truth is pain is your body’s way of revealing its boundaries so you will protect yourself. The truth is you were not designed to live broken, merely surviving and powering through life. The truth is you were designed to thrive and stand tall and walk as a glorious daughter of the one true King. The truth is healing is available.
There is a difference between hope and expectation. We as humans cannot help but compare ourselves to others and place expectations and, therefore, disappointment on our perceived failures. We all have a story. We all have our own unique journey. I believe nothing is wasted in these stories. We have hope in all things and we expect that healing will happen, yet we must be open to what that healing will look like. Remember what the core is: the foundation that everything else is built upon. It is the internal support for all of our external activity. It is essential for life. So healing your core is about healing what is on the inside, not what you look like on the outside.
As a culture, we focus so much on the external components of our life and our bodies and we forget that without the inside being solid, eventually the outside fades and fails. It is from within that healing comes. It is the structure – which sometimes you cannot see but you can feel – that begins the transformation process. Do not be afraid.
You were not designed to live in an identity of brokenness. You were fearfully and wonderfully made.
In our clients we see true healing occur once they trust the truth. It begins when they trust that their body was designed for strength and balance and when they believe in the power of the perfect design to heal and thrive. There are often external changes that are evident, but these changes are always as a result of an internal restoration. The light shines out of that solid foundation.
We understand how hard this journey can be, especially if you have been let down before. Our program was developed from a place of brokenness seeking truth. Kelly Dean, PT, and Owner of The Tummy Team designed this program to find healing for her core after 5 miscarriages and a myriad of emotional pain about her belly. We know it’s hard to hope but we can help you.